We have a cold weather right now so I am having second thoughts if I should return to my swimming lesson starting tomorrow. I am quite having some lazy thoughts and I know I have to listen to my body. But at the back of my mind I am also thinking if I am just making some excuses so that I won’t exercise. Yeah, I am on a stage that I really am not interested in exerting myself because I feel the fatigue right now. The past few weeks have seen me in action, outside and inside the house and I wish to mellow down for awhile. In fact this weekend what I spent majority of my time in bed and reading. Thought I still get up to do some important chores like cleaning the house, washing the clothes and cooking. At this point I don’t know what to do.

I think my LUPUS is active. And I fear of the result of my laboratory test so right now I don’t have the courage to go to the clinic and have my blood extracted and urine to be tested. I have itch all over my body, I think my face is bloated and most of all I am depressed and have been suffering the worst mood. Even the sight of rustic lamps make me sad. The husband has asked me this morning if I am feeling okay already since he knows that if I have terrible mood swings it’s only because my LUPUS is active. I know I have to fight it. And I have to overcome fear. So by next week or the week after next I would be facing the music and having my test. God will help me I know.